A Quick Guide to Being Grateful

"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for." Epicurus

by Travis Hellstrom

It's so easy to get caught up in want. It's also easy to forget to enjoy what we have.

Whether it's getting a new computer, moving into a new apartment, or simply going to a pizza place for dinner, it's easy to get super excited about something and then forget to enjoy it once we have it.

Gratitude is a way through this.

I love how Epicurus says, "remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for."

Things I Only Hoped For

There was a time not too long ago when I dreamed of Advance Humanity becoming something great that would outlive me. I wrote it in a makeshift will during Peace Corps because I felt so strongly about it. In only a few short years, it has started to take shape.

Advance Humanity is a now registered benefit corporation in Vermont, on it's way to becoming a certified benefit corporation, and we just launched a new website this month. We have a long way to go, but I can honestly say this is one of those things that I could have only hoped for years ago. Add on top of that getting married, getting through my first year of graduate school and helping run an amazing organization in Mongolia and the list of things I'm grateful for really takes off.

Appreciating Where We Are

One exercise I like to do with my wife is to ask a series of questions:

• Do you remember where we were one week ago?
• One month ago?
• One year ago?

When you remember each time, think about:

• The place you were physically and emotionally.
• What you were thinking about on a daily basis.
• What you were worrying about at that time.
• What your dreams were at that time.

This takes several minutes for each time period and it's important to step through each of them.

In our case recently it was easy to forget that it was only a week ago that we moved into our new apartment, a month ago we had just come back to Vermont, and that a year ago we had just landed in America.

The point of the exercise is reflection, but I always feel grateful after I do it (without even intending to).

Give it a shot yourself, either alone or with someone you love, and see what happens.

Happiness

The Best Time in Your Life

by Travis Hellstrom

  Teachers in my high school used to look at us and say, "This is the best time of your life. You better enjoy it while you can!"

I remember thinking, "Man, I hope not. I mean this is great and I'm loving it, but it's all downhill from here? Shit. I'm only 15."

Then I got to college and the professor looked at our auditorium full of students saying, "This is the best time of your life. Enjoy it!"

I thought, "Are they sharing the same playbook, what is going on? They better be kidding. If it gets worse from here, what's the point!"

But then luckily I got to Peace Corps and figured it out. They were all just kidding (or kidding themselves).

The first year Volunteers told the Trainees, "Enjoy this, it's the best time of your life!" the second years told the first years that, the third years told the second years, and the staff told it to everyone.

Thank you, I've got it.

You're all right.

This is the best time of my life.

Perpetually, always, right now.

Never before.

Never in the future.

This is it.

Remember that and you've got it made.

And if it's not true, make it true.

That was not the best time of your life, this is supposed to be.