You Can't Lead People Unless You Love People

You can't lead people unless you love people. You can't save people unless you serve people.

- Tavis Smiley

I really enjoyed this interview today with Jon Stewart asking Tavis Smiley about his new book The Death of a King: The Real Story of Martin Luther King Jr.'s Final Year.

In it he says this,

Whatever happened to the notion of love in our public discourse? And that is not a laughable concept. King put love in the center of the public square. Gandhi put love in the public square. Bobby Kennedy put love in the public square... Let me ask you this. Can you name 3 people in leadership in this country who you believe love you enough to die for you?

Pretty deep topic for the Daily Show! And it was recorded on September 11th no less, 13 years after the day that changed that date forever.

Tavis's comments remind me of one of my favorite quotes from Gandhi, "There are many causes I would die for. There is not a single cause I would kill for."

I love what Tavis is pointing at and the reason he wrote his book. He says in the interview that he doesn't want us to remember King as a black man or a martyr. He wants us to remember him as the kind of leader that all of us can be, a leader who speaks the truth and works to make the world better for everyone. He led with love and we can lead with love.

I couldn't agree with Tavis more. Serving is the only way to save others (and ourselves for that matter).

And the only leaders I admire, the ones with pictures up on my wall, are the ones that truly love others.

That's the kind of leader I hope to be.

The Invitation

by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, 'Yes.'

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

 

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I was inspired by Mozart to share and record this poem after he opened his incredible class with it. Thank you for the inspiration Mo!
If this poem speaks to you and you want to record yourself reading it, just go to Soundcloud and make a recording. It's that simple.
When you do record it, please share. I'd love to hear your take on it!

How to Destroy Writer's Block

Whether you're a writer or not, we have all felt a lack of creativity or inability to focus and get something done. As a writer, I know there are times when I feel inspired and writing comes easily. I can write pages in what feels like no time at all. Other times I can spend 30 minutes and only get a sentence or two. It's crazy!

This weekend I watched a 30 minute class by Mozart Guerrier called How to Destroy Writer's Block and it was fantastic!

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Mozart is a good friend (you may remember him from his awesome Everyday Humanitarians interview this summer) and I think the advice he shares is amazing.

Here are his 10 Big Ideas briefly, including many I hadn't thought of before:

  1. Inner Writers’ Script - we all have voices in our head, rewrite your script and make it positive
  2. Accept the Help - before you take in more information (books, blog posts, etc) act on the help you've already received
  3. You Deserve a Three Minute Experiment - write for 3 minutes at a time, that's all - just get started
  4. Community = Life - all great writers don't just do it alone, they have communities of support - find yours
  5. Going Deeper with Quality Music + Books - you get out what you put in - find work you adore and consume it again and again
  6. Embracing Distraction - don't be ashamed, leverage what you love and make it into something great
  7. The *Body* is Bigger than the Brain - start with breathing (4 seconds in, 6 seconds out), talk a walk, take care of yourself
  8. Speak It Out, Yo - ever had talker's block? Of course not. Write how you talk, record yourself - it works wonders.
  9. Chunking and God’s Business - focus on the why, not the what
  10. 3 Magic Questions - Ask these questions to characters in your story: Have you ever been accused of something you didn't do? Do you know the circumstances of your birth? Have you ever almost died?

Thanks for teaching a great class Mozart, I look forward to seeing what you come up with next!

To learn more, check out Mozart's class.

Here's to ending writer's block!

 

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I was so inspired by Mozart's opening to the class with his reading of The Invitation that I decided to do my own!
On Friday I'll share my recording with you as well as a copy of the poem. Check back or subscribe to see it then!

The Happiness of Pursuit

488576280_640  I'm very happy to say that I received an advanced copy of Chris Guillebeau's book, The Happiness of Pursuit: Finding the Quest That Will Bring Purpose to Your Life, which launched today in bookstores around the country and I love it! I've included my brief video review below.

I've been a long-time admirer of Chris and had a chance to sit down with him to ask a few questions about his new book. Thank you Chris for taking the time to share some of your thoughts with us and for writing a really fantastic book.

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What inspired you to write this awesome book?

Well, first I spent 10 years visiting every country in the world. :) After that, I felt like I had a story to tell.

 

What was your favorite part of writing it?

Learning that I wasn't alone in questing. At first I heard stories of other travelers pursuing travel-related quests, but then I began to see that there were all kinds of other quests, too. It was great to see how people had applied the concepts of pursuing a big adventure in their own way.

 

What is a quest? Is it just a long trip or athletic pursuit?

A quest has a few specific characteristics: a clear goal, a real challenge, and a set of milestones along the way. Interestingly, while a quest is often an extended physical journey—like visiting every country in the world or circumnavigating the oceans in a small sailboat—there are many other kinds of quests as well. Over several years of research, I met activists, academics, artists, and others who chose to spend long amounts of time on something that mattered to them. I was interested in why they undertook such a mission, and what happened to them as they drew closer to their goal.

 

How do questers decide on what to pursue and what to avoid?

If you’re going to pursue a quest, you should choose something you’re really excited about. My quest was to visit every country in the world, mostly because I loved travel and enjoyed combining it with the structure of goal-setting. Others focus on their own hobbies or passions, turning them into the long-term pursuits: to knit 10,000 hats, to walk across America, to become a real-life ninja, and so on.

It also helps if there’s a deeper purpose to your quest. Many of the people I talked to for the book felt a sense of calling or mission, even if they weren’t religious. They were compelled; they simply had to pursue the quest. They knew if they didn’t, they would always regret it.

 

Is it important to document a quest?

One of the key themes of quests is that they must be measurable. They must have an end goal—you have to be able to say, “This is what I’m working toward and I’ll complete it when x happens.” Documenting the steps along the way provides tremendous momentum, since you can see how far they’ve come and how far still remains.

In my case I used a Wikipedia article that contained a list of every country. I copied it into Evernote and whenever I visited a new country, I’d place a big X beside it. As the years went by, the number of Xs grew until there were only a few places I hadn’t visited. Finally, I was able to visit those places as well. Just having that file gave me a sense of urgency as I made my plans and set out on another Round-the-World trip or 30-hour series of flights.

 

What happens to someone after they’ve completed the quest or achieved their goal?

Most of the time there's a feeling of accomplishment combined with a sense of melancholy or even alienation. Quests are complicated! Very often, much of the identity of the quester lies in the quest itself. The best path forward is usually to take some time to reflect on the journey. Then—whenever the time is right—you’ll need a new quest.

 

How can people get involved in the amazing work you are doing?

I'm happy to connect with them on my blog or on their preferred social network. Oh, and I'm also doing a 40 city tour for the book. Please join us!

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I encourage everyone to go check out The Happiness of Pursuit by Chris Guillebeau, you won't regret it!